Feeding and Turning
"Feeding"
Both blood-drinking and psi-draining HLV's use the term "feed" to refer to what they actually do. Representatives of both groups have made strong statements to the effect that "feeding" (on blood or "energy") is what makes a Human Living Vampire what it is, and that other identifying "traits" or characteristics (if any) are of little or no importance. However, the function that "feeding" serves for these individuals, why it is necessary and what concrete value the substance fed upon has for the HLV who is feeding, remains a mystery and is rarely explored by the HLV's themselves. "Feeding" appears to be a given; an HLV must feed, feels a compulsion to do so, in the case of psychic vampires may do so involuntarily, and yet nobody seems to understand why.
The term itself--along with the implicit meaning--derives from the 20th Century Vampire Myth, where supernatural vampires usually cannot consume ordinary food and drink, but must have a regular intake of blood for basic nourishment. Although the supernatural vampire is said to "require blood to exist", rarely if ever are such vampires considered in danger of starving to death without blood. Deprived of blood, they will usually be vulnerable to losing control and reverting to a bestial or depraved mental state in which they act thoughtlessly, endangering themselves and/or doing things they regret later on. But they are at no risk of dying, or even experiencing permanent harm, from blood starvation. This makes the blood-need of 20th Century Mythic vampires far more akin to an addiction than a nutritional requirement.
"Feeding" refers to a living organism: we don't "feed" cars with gas or "feed" electrical appliances with electricity, although food acts as fuel for living things. "Feeding" also implies providing an organism with substances without which it will cease to live. Babies require light, physical touch and a hygienic environment in order to thrive, but we only talk about "feeding" a baby when we give it food, something without which it will certainly die. To "feed" something is to provide it with that specific nourishment without which it will quickly starve. But this is certainly not the case with the "feeding" of HLV's, all of whom must eat ordinary food, and drink water, no matter how much blood or "energy" they have available to them. In addition to this, there are other puzzles about HLV's and "feeding". Most blood-drinking HLV's consume human blood, but human blood tends to pass through the digestive tract largely unprocessed, meaning that any purely nutritive content it may have (such as proteins or iron) is mostly lost. Further, few blood-drinking HLV's consume a large amount of blood at any one time, or "feed" with any frequency approaching even once per day. Obviously, blood consumption could not be serving a nutritive purpose for a living organism as large as an adult human being. And yet, the connection of blood with "feeding" is so strong that I have never, to date, heard of a blood-craving HLV who introduced blood into his or her system by any other means than direct ingestion (drinking)--who used, for example, injection, as was depicted in the film, "The Addiction". The blood must be drunk, in spite of the fact that it cannot be digested and that only small quantities (in comparison with the frequency and amounts of food that an adult human being needs) are consumed. What function, then, does the blood serve? If blood-need is an addiction, why would injection not be an even more efficient way of absorbing it? If blood-need is nutritive, why do such small quantities (by comparison with food needs) satisfy the craving? The issues become even more complicated when some blood-craving HLV's assert that only the communion of taking blood from a consenting human donor, sometimes during sex, is truly satisfying to them. The questions raised by pure "psi-feeding", in this context, are even more conflicted.
Nevertheless, all HLV's consider what they do to be "feeding", as though it had a nutritive or sustaining effect. They do not like to think of themselves as addicts, perhaps because of the strong negative associations with addiction in American society. In some ways, they may be analogous to insulin-dependent diabetics, requiring a vital substance that their system lacks and that must be externally provided. However, diabetics and others dependent on such daily medical regimens will die if they are deprived of their prescribed substance. I have never heard of an HLV being in danger of death for lack of blood or "psi energy". If even the worst blood-needing HLV's were in such a position, we would expect to have heard of some who were hospitalized for lack of blood. However, although some blood-needing HLV's report "withdrawal" symptoms so severe as to make them wish they could die, this threat does not seem to be a factor in their situation. The "need" that HLV's experience is for a fix, not a meal.
The chief (indeed, overwhelming) concern for most HLV's seems to be how to "feed" more efficiently, how to find "donors", how to guarantee a regular supply of the needed substance, and so forth--very similar to drug addicts. Very few wonder why they need what they need, this seeming to be entirely beside the point--just as it is a rare drug abuser who is interested in the physiology of his addiction. With addiction, nothing matters but getting the next fix, and how awful it feels not to get it. But if the addiction is considered a legitimate biological need, equivalent to one's hunger for food, then some of the psychological sting is soothed. Some blood-craving vampires, in particular, are very hostile to suggestions that anything else but fresh, living blood from a live donor could satisfy their needs. The possibility that some in-depth research might produce a blood-substitute for HLV's, like methadone, that would render "blood feeding" unnecessary may not be that attractive a prospect. But that is a separate issue. In the meantime, I will refrain from offering any speculations of my own on this subject and leave this mystery to be explored by the HLV's themselves. It will be interesting to see what they propose as possible explanations of why they need to "feed" and why they need to think of it as "feeding" instead of employing a possibly more exact analogy.
Both blood-drinking and psi-draining HLV's use the term "feed" to refer to what they actually do. Representatives of both groups have made strong statements to the effect that "feeding" (on blood or "energy") is what makes a Human Living Vampire what it is, and that other identifying "traits" or characteristics (if any) are of little or no importance. However, the function that "feeding" serves for these individuals, why it is necessary and what concrete value the substance fed upon has for the HLV who is feeding, remains a mystery and is rarely explored by the HLV's themselves. "Feeding" appears to be a given; an HLV must feed, feels a compulsion to do so, in the case of psychic vampires may do so involuntarily, and yet nobody seems to understand why.
The term itself--along with the implicit meaning--derives from the 20th Century Vampire Myth, where supernatural vampires usually cannot consume ordinary food and drink, but must have a regular intake of blood for basic nourishment. Although the supernatural vampire is said to "require blood to exist", rarely if ever are such vampires considered in danger of starving to death without blood. Deprived of blood, they will usually be vulnerable to losing control and reverting to a bestial or depraved mental state in which they act thoughtlessly, endangering themselves and/or doing things they regret later on. But they are at no risk of dying, or even experiencing permanent harm, from blood starvation. This makes the blood-need of 20th Century Mythic vampires far more akin to an addiction than a nutritional requirement.
"Feeding" refers to a living organism: we don't "feed" cars with gas or "feed" electrical appliances with electricity, although food acts as fuel for living things. "Feeding" also implies providing an organism with substances without which it will cease to live. Babies require light, physical touch and a hygienic environment in order to thrive, but we only talk about "feeding" a baby when we give it food, something without which it will certainly die. To "feed" something is to provide it with that specific nourishment without which it will quickly starve. But this is certainly not the case with the "feeding" of HLV's, all of whom must eat ordinary food, and drink water, no matter how much blood or "energy" they have available to them. In addition to this, there are other puzzles about HLV's and "feeding". Most blood-drinking HLV's consume human blood, but human blood tends to pass through the digestive tract largely unprocessed, meaning that any purely nutritive content it may have (such as proteins or iron) is mostly lost. Further, few blood-drinking HLV's consume a large amount of blood at any one time, or "feed" with any frequency approaching even once per day. Obviously, blood consumption could not be serving a nutritive purpose for a living organism as large as an adult human being. And yet, the connection of blood with "feeding" is so strong that I have never, to date, heard of a blood-craving HLV who introduced blood into his or her system by any other means than direct ingestion (drinking)--who used, for example, injection, as was depicted in the film, "The Addiction". The blood must be drunk, in spite of the fact that it cannot be digested and that only small quantities (in comparison with the frequency and amounts of food that an adult human being needs) are consumed. What function, then, does the blood serve? If blood-need is an addiction, why would injection not be an even more efficient way of absorbing it? If blood-need is nutritive, why do such small quantities (by comparison with food needs) satisfy the craving? The issues become even more complicated when some blood-craving HLV's assert that only the communion of taking blood from a consenting human donor, sometimes during sex, is truly satisfying to them. The questions raised by pure "psi-feeding", in this context, are even more conflicted.
Nevertheless, all HLV's consider what they do to be "feeding", as though it had a nutritive or sustaining effect. They do not like to think of themselves as addicts, perhaps because of the strong negative associations with addiction in American society. In some ways, they may be analogous to insulin-dependent diabetics, requiring a vital substance that their system lacks and that must be externally provided. However, diabetics and others dependent on such daily medical regimens will die if they are deprived of their prescribed substance. I have never heard of an HLV being in danger of death for lack of blood or "psi energy". If even the worst blood-needing HLV's were in such a position, we would expect to have heard of some who were hospitalized for lack of blood. However, although some blood-needing HLV's report "withdrawal" symptoms so severe as to make them wish they could die, this threat does not seem to be a factor in their situation. The "need" that HLV's experience is for a fix, not a meal.
The chief (indeed, overwhelming) concern for most HLV's seems to be how to "feed" more efficiently, how to find "donors", how to guarantee a regular supply of the needed substance, and so forth--very similar to drug addicts. Very few wonder why they need what they need, this seeming to be entirely beside the point--just as it is a rare drug abuser who is interested in the physiology of his addiction. With addiction, nothing matters but getting the next fix, and how awful it feels not to get it. But if the addiction is considered a legitimate biological need, equivalent to one's hunger for food, then some of the psychological sting is soothed. Some blood-craving vampires, in particular, are very hostile to suggestions that anything else but fresh, living blood from a live donor could satisfy their needs. The possibility that some in-depth research might produce a blood-substitute for HLV's, like methadone, that would render "blood feeding" unnecessary may not be that attractive a prospect. But that is a separate issue. In the meantime, I will refrain from offering any speculations of my own on this subject and leave this mystery to be explored by the HLV's themselves. It will be interesting to see what they propose as possible explanations of why they need to "feed" and why they need to think of it as "feeding" instead of employing a possibly more exact analogy.
"Turning"
The process of converting an ordinary human being with no HLV tendencies of any kind into a full-fledged HLV is referred to as "turning". Sometimes it is also referred to as "being embraced", a phrase from role-playing games, and there are a few other terms drawn from vampire fiction ("the dark gift", "the dark kiss", "bringing across", "bloodsiring", for example). There is great disagreement among HLV's as to whether "turning" is a real phenomenon or is even possible. Many HLV's, especially the majority who are psi-blood feeders, believe that HLV's are born as they are and cannot be "turned" or "turn" anyone who is not also an HLV by birth themselves. Some HLV's have gone through a dramatic change that to them, feels physical and externally catalyzed. They experienced a sudden development of either blood-craving or psychic vampire tendencies, along with secondary symptoms such as sun sensitivity, nocturnalism, and alterations in appetite. Less often, such individuals report positive changes such as greater strength and stamina, faster healing, better reflexes, enhanced senses and so on. In some cases, these individuals trace the changes in themselves to a specific incident. Blood vampires most often identify an experience of sharing blood with another person who was already a blood vampire--either inadvertently, or with prior agreement that the existing blood vampire was "turning" them. Psychic vampires may identify an experience in which they "linked" or psychically bonded with an existing psychic vampire, sometimes via such media as online chat or the telephone. "Turn" stories involving sex or the injection of an unknown substance (supposedly the existing HLV's blood) have also been described. Although some HLV's reporting this experience believe that it was causative and that they were literally "turned" or transformed from ordinary humans into HLV's, many others see such experiences as awakening latent tendencies that had been dormant in the new HLV all along. It is more common for blood vampires to view the change as externally induced and for psychic vampires to adhere to the idea of awakened latent tendencies. This would be consistent with the origin of the "turn" concept in the 20th Century Vampire Myth. Also, blood vampires are more likely to consider the vampire virus hypothesis seriously and this also lends itself to a model for "turning" caused by the transmission of the virus. However, only a minority of HLV's gives full credence to the possibility of "turning". While some believe that it may be possible, or is possible in rare cases, and a very few hold firmly that "turning" is the only way to become an HLV, the majority of HLV's of all types believe that they were born as they are. Even blood-craving HLV's frequently say that their obsession with and craving for blood goes back as far as they can remember. At least one blood-craving HLV experienced a mid-life awakening of her blood-craving tendencies but has absolutely no idea what could have catalyzed it. For the most part, HLV's regard "turning" as belonging to realm of role-playing and fiction. A separate issue, however, are the constant requests that almost every public HLV receives from people asking to be "turned". The "turn fantasy" is a powerful one for many people who are deeply invested in the vampire metaphor. Such individuals not only contact self-described HLV's asking to be turned, but place vampersonal ads and post messages on messageboards, guestbooks and other fora in droves. Those who are seeking to be "turned" do so with an earnestness and even desperation that is amazing to many HLV's. I have only encountered a tiny handful of people seeking to be "turned" because they had a terminal illness. Most are simply unhappy with their lives, or are seeking to change themselves in some profound way. The majority of them (although by no means all) also seem to be very young. Most HLV's are appalled by requests for "turning", whether they believe such a thing is possible or not. HLV's of all types overwhelmingly regard their condition as a serious liability (indeed, I have yet to hear an exception to this in the vampiric community). They often respond to "turn" requests with a litany of the woes they suffer and demand whether the aspirant has thought through all the disadvantages to life with an uncontrollable craving for blood or energy. In many cases, it seems that the aspirant is not, in fact, asking to be "turned" into an HLV as described on this page. Even though they may be addressing a person (such as Sanguinarius, or myself, or other vampire website owners) who has clearly and unequivocally explained on their public site what they are and what it entails, aspirants seem to be seeking a variant of the 20th Century Vampire Myth. It almost seems as though "turn" aspirants assume that the HLV's are just trying to hide the truth from them; anyone who calls themself a "vampire", they think, must be a "vampire" like the Myth, someone privileged and special who they want to be like. The serious danger lies in the type of person who is all too happy to respond positively to "turn" requests, especially from young women. Just imagine, for comparison, a twelve-year-old girl (with a lack of parental supervision) who got online in various adult chatrooms and fora and announced far and wide that she was looking for a cute, nice boy to lose her virginity to. She will doubtless get many responses, and none of them will be from the kind of decent, respectful, attractive young man she is dreaming about, because those young men don't take advantage of naive young girls. No, she'll hear from the kind of pedophilic creeps who slaver at the prospect of having sex with a twelve-year-old. Many of these men are very skilled at telling young girls exactly what they want to hear. Similarly, the online vampire fora have their own schools of sharks cruising for young girls (and boys) they can lure with a promise of "turning". They will spin stories about being immortals, throwing out more and more outrageous details to test their mark's gullibility. They will promise all the beautiful details in the 20th Century Vampire Myth: agelessness, immortality, power, endless love and an enfolding community of peers. If they succeed in meeting their mark at last, the results could be very serious indeed. There have been a number of cases of girls being tricked into sex under the pretense of "turning", or of people being injected with harmful foreign substances. Some of these vampiroid predators have attempted to form a cult-like "vampire clan" of mind-controlled slaves. Those seeking to be "turned" should reflect carefully on what it is that they are really looking for. Few aspirants to "turning" have in mind the realities of being an HLV of any type. The goals they desire, such as a community of intimate friends and peers, a sense of empowerment, freedom from fear about aging, disease, and death, and so forth are better sought in other ways. Immortality and power are not simply handed out free of charge to anyone who wanders by asking for them. If they are available at all, they are available for a price equivalent to their value.
The process of converting an ordinary human being with no HLV tendencies of any kind into a full-fledged HLV is referred to as "turning". Sometimes it is also referred to as "being embraced", a phrase from role-playing games, and there are a few other terms drawn from vampire fiction ("the dark gift", "the dark kiss", "bringing across", "bloodsiring", for example). There is great disagreement among HLV's as to whether "turning" is a real phenomenon or is even possible. Many HLV's, especially the majority who are psi-blood feeders, believe that HLV's are born as they are and cannot be "turned" or "turn" anyone who is not also an HLV by birth themselves. Some HLV's have gone through a dramatic change that to them, feels physical and externally catalyzed. They experienced a sudden development of either blood-craving or psychic vampire tendencies, along with secondary symptoms such as sun sensitivity, nocturnalism, and alterations in appetite. Less often, such individuals report positive changes such as greater strength and stamina, faster healing, better reflexes, enhanced senses and so on. In some cases, these individuals trace the changes in themselves to a specific incident. Blood vampires most often identify an experience of sharing blood with another person who was already a blood vampire--either inadvertently, or with prior agreement that the existing blood vampire was "turning" them. Psychic vampires may identify an experience in which they "linked" or psychically bonded with an existing psychic vampire, sometimes via such media as online chat or the telephone. "Turn" stories involving sex or the injection of an unknown substance (supposedly the existing HLV's blood) have also been described. Although some HLV's reporting this experience believe that it was causative and that they were literally "turned" or transformed from ordinary humans into HLV's, many others see such experiences as awakening latent tendencies that had been dormant in the new HLV all along. It is more common for blood vampires to view the change as externally induced and for psychic vampires to adhere to the idea of awakened latent tendencies. This would be consistent with the origin of the "turn" concept in the 20th Century Vampire Myth. Also, blood vampires are more likely to consider the vampire virus hypothesis seriously and this also lends itself to a model for "turning" caused by the transmission of the virus. However, only a minority of HLV's gives full credence to the possibility of "turning". While some believe that it may be possible, or is possible in rare cases, and a very few hold firmly that "turning" is the only way to become an HLV, the majority of HLV's of all types believe that they were born as they are. Even blood-craving HLV's frequently say that their obsession with and craving for blood goes back as far as they can remember. At least one blood-craving HLV experienced a mid-life awakening of her blood-craving tendencies but has absolutely no idea what could have catalyzed it. For the most part, HLV's regard "turning" as belonging to realm of role-playing and fiction. A separate issue, however, are the constant requests that almost every public HLV receives from people asking to be "turned". The "turn fantasy" is a powerful one for many people who are deeply invested in the vampire metaphor. Such individuals not only contact self-described HLV's asking to be turned, but place vampersonal ads and post messages on messageboards, guestbooks and other fora in droves. Those who are seeking to be "turned" do so with an earnestness and even desperation that is amazing to many HLV's. I have only encountered a tiny handful of people seeking to be "turned" because they had a terminal illness. Most are simply unhappy with their lives, or are seeking to change themselves in some profound way. The majority of them (although by no means all) also seem to be very young. Most HLV's are appalled by requests for "turning", whether they believe such a thing is possible or not. HLV's of all types overwhelmingly regard their condition as a serious liability (indeed, I have yet to hear an exception to this in the vampiric community). They often respond to "turn" requests with a litany of the woes they suffer and demand whether the aspirant has thought through all the disadvantages to life with an uncontrollable craving for blood or energy. In many cases, it seems that the aspirant is not, in fact, asking to be "turned" into an HLV as described on this page. Even though they may be addressing a person (such as Sanguinarius, or myself, or other vampire website owners) who has clearly and unequivocally explained on their public site what they are and what it entails, aspirants seem to be seeking a variant of the 20th Century Vampire Myth. It almost seems as though "turn" aspirants assume that the HLV's are just trying to hide the truth from them; anyone who calls themself a "vampire", they think, must be a "vampire" like the Myth, someone privileged and special who they want to be like. The serious danger lies in the type of person who is all too happy to respond positively to "turn" requests, especially from young women. Just imagine, for comparison, a twelve-year-old girl (with a lack of parental supervision) who got online in various adult chatrooms and fora and announced far and wide that she was looking for a cute, nice boy to lose her virginity to. She will doubtless get many responses, and none of them will be from the kind of decent, respectful, attractive young man she is dreaming about, because those young men don't take advantage of naive young girls. No, she'll hear from the kind of pedophilic creeps who slaver at the prospect of having sex with a twelve-year-old. Many of these men are very skilled at telling young girls exactly what they want to hear. Similarly, the online vampire fora have their own schools of sharks cruising for young girls (and boys) they can lure with a promise of "turning". They will spin stories about being immortals, throwing out more and more outrageous details to test their mark's gullibility. They will promise all the beautiful details in the 20th Century Vampire Myth: agelessness, immortality, power, endless love and an enfolding community of peers. If they succeed in meeting their mark at last, the results could be very serious indeed. There have been a number of cases of girls being tricked into sex under the pretense of "turning", or of people being injected with harmful foreign substances. Some of these vampiroid predators have attempted to form a cult-like "vampire clan" of mind-controlled slaves. Those seeking to be "turned" should reflect carefully on what it is that they are really looking for. Few aspirants to "turning" have in mind the realities of being an HLV of any type. The goals they desire, such as a community of intimate friends and peers, a sense of empowerment, freedom from fear about aging, disease, and death, and so forth are better sought in other ways. Immortality and power are not simply handed out free of charge to anyone who wanders by asking for them. If they are available at all, they are available for a price equivalent to their value.
